Day Two....

of my training went very well. I am very excited. I was for sure thinking it was going to be hard, but have found that it is really easy. I know...it is only day two, but I am hopeful.

Step One...complete

November of 2009 I had had enough of looking like a fat frumpy mom/person (as my great friend Amy put it about so many women/moms) and decided it was time to get my health in order. I was talking to a gal at work and she mentioned Weight Watchers. I wasn't quit sure that was the right path to take, because of the cost. She then continued to tell me that she use to teach for Weight Watchers and had all the stuff I would need to get started. So she brought me all her stuff and I began to read and dive into the program. I picked the points system and off I went. We decided that she was going to do it with me and that we would weigh in every Tuesday at school to keep track of losses and gains (to have that kind of support you get when you go to weekly meetings at Weight Watchers). The first week was really hard and I was really hungry, but I as I continued and the lbs. came off, I feel in love with it. My appetite decreased, I eliminated soda and all the junk food, and stopped going out to eat (as far as fast food places). I keep my flex pts. for the weekend just in case I wanted to go out and eat at a restaurant or go to the movies. Life started to change. I went down 3 pant sizes and 1 shirt size and today I have lost a total of 25.4 lbs.
My sister came to me the other day and asked if I wanted to do the Race for the Cure with her on May 8th. I was very hesitant and not sure that would be something I could do. BUT...I said YES! I've been talking about walking the Race for awhile and never thought that I could run it, but I am going to do it. Today I completed Step One. I took myself down to The Salt Lake Running Co. and bought me a pair of running shoes and inserts. I really felt good walking in there and telling the sales lady exactly what I wanted and she just went to it. Before I would of never stepped foot in that place cause I laked the self confidence. NOT TODAY!!! I finished my errands and when I came home off went the street clothes and on came the workout clothes and I hit the pavement. I have decided to use the Couch to 5K training plan to help me prepare for the Race, since I heard that was a good place to start. So today the chart said: walk 5 min., jog 2 min., then walk 5 min. OMH did that feel great! I could of gone on, but promised myself and my sister that I would stick to the training and not over do it. How exhilarating that feels to know that I can do this and nothing is going to get in my way!

I think it is funny...

when someone reads a blog and totally takes it out to its content. I mean, come on people! Re-read it and get your facts straight before you go and run your mouth off and cause problems! Because causing problems is the last thing I need in my life.

My little angel

Last night Brooklyn woke up around 8:30 p.m. after being asleep for only 45 mins. I let her cry for awhile and then she really started to get upset and cry harder. So I got ready for bed and went in to get her and put her in bed with me. Now I usually don't do that and because I did with my 5-year-old when she was little....she now doesn't have good sleep patterns. In fact about 4 out of the 7 days in the week she ends up on my floor or I end up in her bed laying by her. So to all that I believe, Brooklyn is in bed with me and she starts to cough...or should I say bark like a seal! OMH not again!! So I crack a window and let the cold air come into the room.....well her comes Bethie. "Mom can you lay by me?" Well I ended up putting Brooklyn back in her bed, cranked up the cool mist, and laid by Bethie. Brooklyn went back to sleep and Bethie laid there and finally went back to bed. I got back into my room around 3:45 a.m. and I laid there! All this sickness keep running through my mind....Why can't we stay well!! Two reasons the dr. told me this afternoon.....1. I have a kindergartner and 2. My child is in daycare. Plus, on top of Brooklyn going to daycare..she had croup at the age of 3 months which makes her more prone to all and everything out there! LUCKY ME!! I guess I am just thankful to have a good boss and know that she understands (at least she says she does and I pray that she does!!!) Anyway...today I decided to put her in a big girl bed and to heck with all this baby stuff. She has been going potty in the toilet and so why not! Tonight I had to lay by her just to give her that self assurance that it was okay to be in a big girl bed and she fell asleep quite well. Just looking at her asleep makes it all worth it! She is such a good baby and I wouldn't trade that for anything! Thanks Heavenly Father for sending her and her spirit to me....I feel you knew what was going to happen in my life after she was born and that is why I have her....

Have you ever?

So last night I watched 2012 and am not sure today if that was a great idea. I have had the biggest anxiety attack ever and can't seem to get those things out of my mind. I was texting a good friend this morning about it and she asked if I thought that is how the world is going to come to an end. I really haven't really thought about that kind of thing, but have you ever really sat down and wondered? Well, I thought that because of our beliefs that it wouldn't be that drastic...Well boy was I wrong. I went in and started talking to my parents and they pretty much disagreed with me. The world will be cleansed by fire and the wicked will be burned! And it will be that bad, but not to worry is what they said! There it goes...ANXIETY!!!!!! Not that I am some horrible person and that I have committed murder or something like that, but the fear set in. Why is it that I am afraid of what is to come when our Savior comes again? Why is it that that concept causes so much anxiety? HELP!

I just don't know......

why this week has been sooo bad! I have been the crankiest person in the whole wide world. I just don't know what the heck is going on. One minute I want to cry and go to bed and the other I am dropping words that I don't ever use and am just hateful. I am not sure what to even say to people and if you talk to me, my tone of voice just might bite your head off (don't believe me ask my parents especially my mom). We are going on almost 6 wks where PJ hasn't come and taken Bethie and hell forget Brooklyn...he doesn't even ask about her! Work has been really hard, not because of work related stuff, but because my child attends the same school and has issues! Brooklyn has been sick and I missed three full days of work just to take her to the dr. office to get a shot because she refused to take her meds. and was getting sicker. I am tired of let down and really don't know how to handle it, why is it so easy for men to get back in the dating field? Three months after things ended with the divorce and that, PJ is shacked up with some girl. Wait, some woman and her two teenage kids. let alone the other young adults that don't live with her. What is that all about?
I might say I am sorry to all of you who read this, but I'm not! This is how it has been for about two weeks and...................................................................................